Paper Heart
by ElegantArrow 64
Summary: Because according to A, Valentines Day was a holiday invented to give people a reasonable excuse to have sex one day a year. And not even L can say 'no' on a holiday as far as B was concerned. B/L A/B Yaoi One-shot.


Arrow: So since it's been awhile since I've written anything I wanted to test myself and see if I could successfully write a one-shot in one day without taking any breaks and I am proud to say I've succeeded. J

The only reason this 'Valentines Day' fic is being post four days after the supposed holiday is because I was more eager to finish 'TTWWW' before I started or posted anything else and school ended up side tracking me once again (senior year, whoo!)

So now I bring you a much belated fic focusing around the characters After Always, Beyond Birthday, and L Lawiette. I highly suggest that you have read Death Note: Another note in order to have some background info on the characters and setting. Knowledge is power!

Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note- plain and simple.

Now read!

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The remaining snow sparkled against the dead grass struggling to reach out from beneath the ice crusted layer of dirt preventing the sun from feeding it's frozen roots, a colorful and somewhat ugly description of what the world outside in Winchester, England resembled on such a heart felt holiday. B had never been one for in detail descriptions of the outdoors but A had badgered him about the depressing atmosphere ever since they had woken up that morning. The small amount of sun which had graced the dead plains surrounding the orphanage had finally aloud the clouds to catch up and was swallowed by them as the clock struck noon- a time for a break and a recess held inside the play room do to the frigid weather.

Valentines Day was always a treat in Whammy's House. A chance to pass out numerous decorated cards and paper cut-outs which girls dabbled with crayons and stickers in an attempt to impress their friends, saving the best for the boys. It was a competition of sorts; a way to show who was better. To show that perhaps they actually had a chance at being 'socially acceptable' out in the real world.

Beyond never received any.

It wasn't really a problem in his eyes, though many girls saw this as a symbol of repulsion. No one dared give B a Valentine in fear of gaining unwanted attention from the boys amber eyes. Even as B helped himself to a variety of cupcakes and cookies at the start of lunch he couldn't help but notice the continuous glances from the female figures, some snickering in what he figured was spite. Annoyed more than usual, he buried himself in a seat next to A, placing his assortment of snacks on top of a large stack of books, curling his legs up and against himself so he was practically hidden within the cushions. Even at the age of sixteen he could fit into small spaces- a useful skill when one wants to hide away.

B didn't want to hide- he just hated people.

His room mate was the only one he ever spoke with.

It wasn't long before the other resurfaced from behind what appeared to be an encyclopedia written in French, blue eyes peaking out to narrow at the untouched cakes and treats seated on his reading collection. He turned his attention to the silent culprit.

"I'm hoping those are for me since my books have seem to become your place mat." he mumbled quietly.

B didn't even spare him a glance. "Eat them if you want, I don't care."

A refused the offer with a loud snap of his book. "If you pick off the heart shaped sprinkles they'll just be normal cupcakes B." he explained, assuming the pink color was the problem. The boy shot him a look colder than the air keeping them from venturing outside and A buckled, turning his eyes away as usual. B was his friend but his shyness remained a large piece of his personality.

However not even his shyness could hide the collection of pink hearts sticking out from the white pages of his book.

B gritted his teeth, eyes flashing.

"Well aren't we Mr. Popular all of a sudden." he hissed, fingers curling against the arms of the chair.

"…" A simply put his book to the side, staring up at the ceiling in an attempt to block out the others prescience, heaving in a deep sigh. "It doesn't mean anything B…" he explained, voice soft.

"Then why do you keep them in your book, expecting any visitors tonight? Any phone calls?" B cocked his head with a wide smirk, knowing for a fact the boy wouldn't go anywhere without his permission. When the lights turned off order was different up on the fourth floor- people other than L were in charge when the supervisors turned off their flashlights and retired till the morning. He could tell A was thinking the same thing by the way his hand gripped at his jeans, twisting the stiff fabric until a small hole was visible where he had forced his finger through.

"B, you're really taking this Valentines Day thing too seriously." he muttered suddenly, frowning at the boy in such a fashion that the smirk fell from his lips with a start. "Don't you know what they say about Valentines Day?"

"… what who says?"

"Everyone. Everyone knows why this holiday is even celebrated, even the Americans know and they use it for their own selfish reason." A pointed out. "Valentines Day is nothing but a ploy- an excuse for people to get together and have sex with each other and blow everyone else off just for one day of the year. Instead of going to work or conducting a meeting all one has to say is 'But it's Valentines Day' and you can spend the rest of the day making love."

B blinked his red eyes at the usually silent boy, taken back by his forwardness on the subject. A only talked like that when he was preaching knowledge and although one might argue, this definitely was knowledge he was preaching despite the crudeness of it.

_An excuse to make love…_

B's eyes fell on the valentines again.

"Is that what those are asking you?" he questioned, staring at the red hearts with fresh disgust. Growing annoyed, A yanked them out from the heavy pages and shoved them at him as proof that the Valentines were 'question free' and consisted of a collection of stickers and discolored streaks of crayon. B handed them back to him with a puzzled smile.

"So I can use today as an excuse to make love?"

"That's what the books said." A answered, pulling out a smaller volume with no title and leaning back into the comfort of his seat. Truth was he was lying to him; a habit he had picked up once he learned of the boys psychotic behavior and learned what sort of situations set him off. He thought he was saving him in a way… keeping him out of trouble…

L had asked him personally.

"Alright." a glimmer had appeared in B's eyes before A could make note of it and he stretched out from the safety of his chair, pale limbs starch white against the fabric of his black shirt, ebony locks messily framing his face. The girls screeched as he ran past but he paid them no attention, jumping up the stairs to the second floor hoping his journey would remain free of detour and interruption. L was secretive but he never stayed hidden- he cared for his successors too much.

B was happy… he never hid from him… he almost seemed to enjoy his company. But no one would ever enjoy L's company as much as B did.

Everything about him was beautiful- a beacon of succession, a drop of sugar against paper stained with spilt ink. B had been taken in by Whammy's House for his brain power even though many claimed his brain was somewhat twisted compared to the average human beings. L blamed it on age… a burden for having such a brilliant mind. A minor set back which could be fixed…

Perhaps B admired L because he hoped one day he could fix him. Make him normal and likeable like everyone else… make him important and worthy to the world. He would one day succeed L.

He would _be_ L.

The door opened with a small creak and he stepped inside.

Nothing had changed since the last time he had crept in over a week ago. The floor remained dusty and bright, books scattered and placed in unusual places: underneath tables, on top of lamps, stacked in the orbs of the chandelier, L had a place for everything. The place he chose to position himself was in a small corner in the back of the messy room surrounded by various computer monitors, hidden beneath a collection of used and clean tea-cups, the sour smell of old coffee blocked by the presence of sugar.

The cupcakes had not gone untouched by him.

"L?" though his name hung clear as daylight above his head to the boys eyes he didn't dare speak it out loud, desperate to keep it his secret for a little longer. He had explained to L about the things he could see… but he knew he didn't believe him. One day he would reveal his name and the acceptance of his gift would be inevitable.

Aliases meant nothing to him.

A large clink echoed from the cluttered desk and the man barely turned around. "Yes?"

"I… I wanted to talk to you L." B stammered, face going red as he realized exactly what he was getting himself into- this was insane, asking the greatest detective, his idol, such a request. But if what A said was true…

B had never doubted A's knowledge.

There was a small pause. A clink. Silence.

"B, has Rodger allowed you to come back up hear?" came the reply, hiding a scolding waiting to be released. L never yelled without a proper reason.

"Yes." he lied, taking a small step forward. "I just… came up to ask you something."

It was several minutes before the detective actually acknowledged him, the process of uncurling himself from his scrunched up position (which B had mastered) and making his way across the book cluttered room proved longer than usual. Whatever L had been doing was still buzzing around in the mechanical working of his brilliant mind, distracting him from the presence of the other. He did a good job at seeming grateful to see him however, the pale lips curled back into a warm smile.

B felt his heart shudder.

"What is it B, you're not in trouble again I hope?" he asked, almost as a precaution in case B was simply using him as an excuse to hide from Rodger which he had done on more than one occasion. B explained to him that he was free of trouble for the day, secretly admiring the fact that he knew all of B's tricks by heart. He took time out of his day to study him… they were both so alike.

"I just…" he tried to focus, staring up at him with confused eyes. Despite being sixteen B was still a bit below L's natural height, making him feel even younger as he stuttered beneath the mans black gaze. "I… well I wanted to wish you a happy Valentines Day."

That was the right way to ask… right?

L's face remained natural, almost relieved. "Happy Valentines Day to you to B. I hope you're enjoying yourself today."

"Y-yeah… well…" his heart leaped with joy and he wrapped his arms tightly around the other, face glowing. "I wasn't before, but I am now." he had said it back… that fact that he had said it back made the process complete- he had actually accepted!

"Don't spend your time up here with me, go enjoy yourself downstairs." L urged, hugging him back with tired eyes. "You need to be social B. It will make things a lot easier for you."

"But I have you, don't I? Spending time with you on Valentines Day is what Valentines Day is all about." he curled his fingers in his cotton shirt, smirking at him seductively. "I know the rules L."

L's face morphed into a look of perplexion. "Rules?"

"Of course if you don't want any rules, that's fine with me." B pressed him up against the wall, minding the stacks of books while planting tiny kisses against the base of his neck, tiny morsels of sugar sticking to his lips as he moved about. The smirk stayed on his face as a symbol of victory- a test of dominance against the other.

L's hand flew out to stop him before the base of his shirt was lifted up. "B. We've talked about this." he reminded him, voice losing it's cheerful quality. The smirk on B's face only widened, already caught up in the game he had started.

"But that was last time. This time is different, I have a reasonable excuse. That's what Valentines Day is for." he tangled his fingers in the mans hair, nipping at his lower lip playfully, sampling him before continuing. "Today we can do anything and no one can judge us. We're just celebrating like we're supposed too."

"B, where did you get such a-" the boys lips swallowed his words before they could leave his mouth and the sweetness silenced him, catching the detective at a weak moment, eyes fluttering shut. His tongue danced against his automatically and the boys hands snuck underneath the white shirt, fingers curling against the waste band of his jeans.

The books beside them toppled over as L jumped.

B only smiled.

"I'll go first."

The situation had rained upon L so fast that he was having trouble finding away around the predicament B had brought with him like the plague, turning even the simplest of conversations into trouble. His mind was on other matters- wrapped in a case he was eager to solve in order to insure his cases in Europe were completed before he set off to America to help New York with a little situation f their own they were having trouble bringing to a close. He had never considered Valentines Day a holiday worth celebrating; the only thing he looked forward to was Watari's cupcakes and a fresh cup of Cherry Cordial tea. B was delusional and L would have blamed it on his condition if it weren't for the purity of his earlier words, a repeat of knowledge he had obviously gained from another source.

L had to push him away. He had to tell him the truth and end this inappropriate situation before it got out of hand. The books which had toppled over had succeeded in blocking the door but L's morals told him this was twisted and unprofessional.

But L had made one mistake.

He had doubted B's boldness.

"B!" his whole body shuddered in reaction as the boys hand slid cleverly inside his jeans, legs buckling in an attempt to shake him off, sliding against the wall until his backside hit the floor. B followed him down until he was at level with his groin, snaking the zipper of his pants down with a matured sense of swiftness, as if he had practiced it... performed it…

Something clicked in the back of L's mind but he was too distracted to confront it.

His hands twisted in B's hair angrily.

"I said stop it Beyond!" he snapped threateningly, all acts of kindness gone. The detective shun fourth in his bold eyes, determined to scare B away without having to use physical force. Even if he was driven to it he knew he couldn't do it- B was still his successor, as fucked up as he might be…

B still considered himself a key player in the game.

And with a challenging smirk he pulled the half hardened skin out from beneath the two layers of fabric and draped his lips across it to the hilt.

The moans which threatened to irrupt from L's throat never made it past his lips, covering his mouth with his left hand as his whole body convulsed in response to the sudden pleasure he rarely allowed himself the chance to experience during his days of continuous work. His anger was dominant however and it showed in his eyes , each black pupil clouding over while struggling to keep his composure. He was determined to let B know that despite how his body reacted he was not okay with this. He would never be okay with it as long as he lived.

Immediately B began to work his tongue around the base, satisfied with the taste and size of it until the skin began to swell, stretching his lips as far as they would go until he was forced to draw back, latching onto the head and swirling his pink tongue about the tip until it turned red and swollen, lapping up the fluid coating his lips. He had imagined this so many times- a night time fantasy he pleasured himself with when there was nothing but to do when A stayed up studying till dawn. The taste of him was similar, almost identical.

But to feel it inside him…

B's eyes fluttered at the thought and he felt his legs tremble weakly.

'_Perhaps if I do this right he'll do it… maybe he'll reward me if I'm good.'_

This single thought served as his motivation and he took the detective in deeper until he felt he would choke with the effort. The more he moved about the more L's hips moved up to meet his tongue, slamming against the back of his throat momentarily until he gained control of himself, desperate to prevent aiding him. His hand was covered in teeth marks and throbbed severely with the pain inflicted by his jaw. He hated this feeling… this part of him which wanted more while the majority of his person wanted nothing more than to stop.

If it were anyone else he would have ended the situation long ago…

But B… his resemblance…

Something about it triggered something deep within his psyche which made it harder to refuse. L had never loved anyone in his whole life except himself. B… as much as he hated to admit it, was the closest thing he would ever find.

The anger within him boiled in contrast to the pleasure.

"Beyond…" he gasped, voice strained with the effort to keep it in control. He wanted him to look up at him, to see how much he hated it. Only when his hips began to move on their own again did he manage to make a compromise with his tortured body and use it in a way to teach B a lesson concerning his boundaries.

L's fingers tangled in the boys hair and he yelped before the detective forced his head down deeper, rolling his hips up into his wet mouth.

Pleasure irrupted in his veins.

Only when L failed to release his head after several minutes of thrusting did B look up to meet his eyes, hazy and thick with confusion.

L was using him like this…

The game had back-fired.

Saliva trickled from the corner of his sore lips, spilling out to make room for the skin which was slowly starting to tremble even as L's speed picked up. Tears squinted in the corners of B's eyes from the pain on his scalp… L's tightening fingers.

The detectives body arched with a light gasp and B sputtered with the sudden intake of liquid as he came, unable to pull away from the detectives shuddering form. It burned the back of his throat, coated his tongue, yet aroused him to the point of submission so that the hands no longer had to press against him to keep him still.

L was his valentine… his wanted-to-be lover…

Before he could bask in his pleasure however, his head was harshly yanked up to the detectives eye level pulling a yell from the boys throat which sent a cascade of liquid spilling to the floor, dribbling across his clothes. The yes which he had imagined as loving and blissful were cold and angry, a spark growing in his features as the pleasure drained away.

B shut his mouth in fear.

L held onto him until he had cleaned himself off and readjusted his clothes, dragging the boy into the back room where ears couldn't reach. B had never been yelled at by L before and he was positive he could have gone his whole life without it. All the niceness was put aside, allowing the true L to show his colors to his successor.

B's heart ached as he tried to explain himself.

"I thought that's what Valentines Day was about," he mumbled, avoiding L's eyes as he wiped harshly at his face with a wet cloth, wiping away the dried fluid. "I've never cared before but once I found out what the point of it as-"

"That is not the point of the holiday Beyond." L stressed with strained patience. "there is no holiday in the whole world that makes it okay to perform a sexual act. _None_." he paused for a moment, allowing the cloth to soak up the substance coating his cheek. "Except perhaps a honeymoon."

"But-"

"The point is, you overstepped your boundaries after I've warned you about controlling yourself not even a week ago. Your admiration for me is dangerous and threatening to your future."

The boys cheeks stung with the coldness of the drying water, his face pained. He had heard L preach this to him countless times and every time he asked the same question.

"…why?"

L's eyes met his with the same answer.

"Because I can't give you anything back Beyond." he dropped the cloth, offering him a sad smile B had never seen play upon his face before. "Not even on Valentines Day."

In the silence which followed B felt a part of him shut down; the part of him which was actually in tact and clean of all broken wires and circuits, leaving him with the twisted bent mass which no one had succeeded in untangling. The color in his eyes darkened and he turned away.

"I'm leaving."

L felt the tension rise, eyes fixed on the back of the boys head. "B…"

His eyes tilted to meet his, broken and empty. "Yes?"

"… who told you that was the meaning of Valentines Day?"

"…"

B turned his head away just in time to hide the demented red glow spreading to the whites of his eyes.

"The internet. Don't worry about it though, I was stupid to believe it. I apologize L."

He walked to the door without even a second glance back, bare feet scraping the wooden floor before he turned the knob and headed out. He was already late to his next class… skipping the rest of the day seemed like a good idea.

_L… Lawli… _

He was drowning.

The stairs bled ink as he walked down to the second floor and he couldn't help but smile at the feeling of the warm liquid seeping between his toes with each step. It had been awhile since they had done that… L said they had fixed it to prevent it from happening again.

It seeped from the walls… the stench of it sour and intoxicating.

The house was broken again.

Little did B know that it was him that was broken.

And L couldn't help but wonder - as he sat alone in his study, feet curled up beneath him as he struggled to regain his train of thought from earlier - if B was capable of being fixed. He was breaking him with his refusal to love him.. He knew that much. But what was L to do?

In hid profession l was forbidden to love. It was an unspoken rule which he lived by. A rule he hoped his successors would figure out on their own when the time came to pass the torch, when old age or tragedy swept him away from the mortal world.

L was simply teaching him.

But B would never be willing to learn as long as he lived.

And sadly… L accepted it.

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"Hey A."

The halls bustled with students as the last few seconds of the school day came to pass, candy wrappers and crumpled hearts littering the floor as they headed off to there rooms. Dinner was an hour away and many students were too full from their snacks to attend. A surfaced from his classroom with his usual collection of books, blonde hair flat and messy against his blue eyes.

B smiled at him from down the hall.

"Hey, are you going up to your room?" he asked, raising his voice so he could be heard above the remaining orphans.

A was too far away to see the vengeance in his eyes.

"Y-yeah." he stuttered, slightly taken back at being addressed. His friend had been absent all day and his books never talked back to him. "Yeah, I'm going."

"Good, I'm going up too. Hurry up."

His feet padded against the dirtied floor as he hurried to his side, offering a weak smile. He meant it, actually… B was his only friend.

"So how was your Valentines Day?" he asked hesitantly.

L's smile widened. "Terrible."

"…oh."

The awkward tension only fueled B's urges.

A struggled against it to try and regain the calm flow of the conversations.

"I'm… I'm sorr-"

"It's okay."

He turned to face him, placing his spider like hands on his shoulders with a tight squeeze. The madness twisted his smile into a sadistic smirk unreadable to the boys innocent eyes.

"I know how to fix it."

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'_Then we wished them all a happy birthday  
We kissed them all goodnight. Now he chases me to my room,  
chases me to my room, chases me  
In my black and red dress'_

- Happy Birthday, The Birthday Massacre

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Beyond needed fixing.

No… he needed to be saved. The madness crept up upon him with each crudely drawn heart and rich textured cupcake which was brought on by the holiday which had ruined his chances with the one man he devoted his whole life to becoming. He had trusted A because he was smart… A was the genius, the prodigy, the prototype L worked so hard on.

A had lied to B in a deliberate attempt to seem cool- a big loss on his part. His lie was better left in silence, never to be spoken to the one boy who happened to be the most dangerous amidst L's collection of orphans. In a world plagued by sin A had only sinned once… he had sinned to sin itself.

In the absence of day A suffered for his mistake.

"B…" he moaned, clutching the blood drenched covers of the bed with bruised fingers, eager to stay latched onto the only solid piece of material which hadn't succeeded in hurting him. The door to his room was barricaded with a collection of books, chairs, and clothing, some of which was his own that he had been wearing earlier in the day. His screams had succeeded in rattling his jeans to the flood beneath his chair and he found himself staring at them each time he managed to reopen his tear stained eyes.

His body… his body was broken… breaking…

B's hips slammed into him another time and he howled with the onslaught of pain, the sickening pleasure he was forced to feel twisting inside him like a knife with each passing assault. His stomach ached with the intake of liquid, cum coating his lips and face which he was forced to swallow each time he chose to use his mouth to service him. The words B spoke to him were nonsense… twisted and obscene…

A's innocence was being torn from him.

"I'm sorry… B… p-please…"his face rocked into the comforter, cold with his own saliva from where he had directed his screams earlier on in the night; the point of it seemed useless now. "I didn't mean… lie… I didn't mean to…"

But B couldn't hear him- he hadn't heard a single word the boy had said to him since he had barricaded the door earlier in the day. The ink had followed him from the staircase and it dripped down across A's bleach white walls, eager to reach him from his spot upon the bed. He wouldn't let it this time- not until his picture was complete.

"Beyond!" A cried as the boys hips raised up, striking him in the spot which was quickly driving him to madness. His legs shook with the effort of holding himself up but he didn't dare fall in fear of placing his weight on his cum filled stomach, hoping to avoid the pain. The blondes mind was melting with the sensations, growing… growing…

With a shuddering moan A's body convulsed, spilling his seeds onto the dirtied covers , blue eyes rolling into the back of his head. The blinding white light was becoming more familiar to him as B continued to use him. This was his fourth time… or was it his third?

The feeling of relief never came this time.

"God… no… nn… again," his words were starting to slur, drained of so much strength that he could no longer keep his mouth closed. "Cum… c-cuming… please…" the spring in his groin began to tighten again and he found himself moving his hips up to meet B's. "Oh god, please…"

"Beg for it." the boy hissed suddenly, pressing his head harder against the comforter in an attempt to keep him still. "Beg for it like L would…" he could almost make out the black hair beneath his clenched fingers, see the black eyes rolling back in place of A's bright blue. The young genius was nothing but a substitute for B's sick fantasies as they bled from him as clearly as the ink threatening to erase him from reality.

"I can't b-beg like him B… I don't know how…!" he stammered, desperate for release. "I just want the feeling to go away… please make it… go…ngh!" the skin inside him swelled before he could finish and he rocked and squirmed against the mattress as he felt the rush of hot liquid filling him… stretching him…

"You can be my Valentine for today A," B whispered in his ear, running his tongue along his cheek. "You can be my L…"

He wrapped his hand around the boys thickened member and he came on contact, his moans muffled by B's fingers as he shoved them in his mouth.

Yes- A could relieve him of his urges and B would teach him to do it right. He would be his L only when he could no longer stand the distance and run to him before he caused any more trouble. The quiet genius would finally have a friend and a purpose during his stay at Whammy's.

_L…_

With his finger B dragged his sharpened nail across the trembling boys back, leaving a tiny red tick mark next to a collection of others which he had joyfully carved into the boys skin during their extended training session. Together the ticks formed a half finished heart, the contents of it almost covering his entire back.

'_Sixteen more to go.'_

He licked the blood from his finger.

"Happy Valentines Day A."

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Arrow: I knowww sick and twisted but I can't say it wasn't terribly amusing, heh. A is such rape material and very few people on the web actually give A any story credit. His characters very undeveloped in the novel but many can assume that he was the quiet, sensitive bookworm type( I won't say anything else do to spoilers.)

So now that I have this little fic done I may start on some others before I choose to dig up 'Broken English' again. I'm sorry if it seems like I'm stalling guys but after typing up two complete chapters and then having them suddenly vanish, it's kind of hard trying to motivate yourself to retyping them. Perhaps I'm hoping some day they'll just magically reappear. L

-crosses fingers- please review and thank you for reading!


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